Are you a parent who is planning on getting a divorce? If so, you may be afraid of how the divorce is going to impact your children. After all, most divorcing parents have this concern. Surely, you’ve heard the statistics – how divorce can affect a child emotionally, academically, and relationship-wise. But, it’s not all bad.
In Psychology Today, author Wendy Paris wrote, “Research shows that about 80-percent of children of divorce adapt well and see no lasting negative effects on their grades, social adjustment, or mental health.” We have to agree with Paris. So, the question is, how do you split with your child’s other parent and avoid the negative effects of divorce upon your children? Is there some kind of secret? In a way, yes.
Happy Children After Divorce
If you want your children to be happy after the divorce, you will do yourself a huge favor by having a good relationship with their other parent. That’s pretty much what it comes down to! Regardless of why you broke up, it’s important to set your differences aside and get along for the sake of the kids. This single factor can make all the difference in how your children cope with the divorce.
“Children benefit from emotionally stable parents – adults who are recuperated enough, in the case of divorce, to focus on the basic job of parenting, including establishing stability, exercising fair discipline, providing love and being emotionally responsive,” said Paris.
Some tips on getting along with your child’s other parent:
- Don’t badmouth the other parent on social media.
- During the divorce, remain polite and respectful towards your spouse.
- Act in the “best interests of the children,” even when it’s difficult.
- Be flexible about scheduling. For example, be willing to watch your children on the other parent’s night when they need to work or attend a special event. See it as bonus kid time, not an inconvenience.
- Do not badmouth the other parent to your children and don’t badmouth their new boyfriend or girlfriend.
- Don’t cause a scene with your ex at your children’s events. Instead, be nice and get along with the other parent.
- Keep the other parent updated on what’s happening in your child’s life.
- Treat your former spouse how you want to be treated.
We hope this advice serves you well in the near future. At Cairns Law Offices, we specialize in low-cost, no-fault divorces, which are made possible by spouses who are willing to work together during the divorce.
If you’re interested in working with your spouse to achieve a divorce for just $219, please give us a call for a free consultation. We are here to make the divorce process as quick and easy as possible for you.