For many unhappy couples, divorce is for the best. But even when divorce is the only solution, that doesn’t make it any easier when it comes to parenting after divorce. If you’re a parent who’s heading down the divorce path, likely your biggest concerns will be over your children’s happiness and wellbeing.
If you’re worried about how the divorce will affect your children or how you will manage to successfully co-parent with your soon-to-be-ex, we have some tips and advice that can certainly help. Fortunately, with the right amount of diligence, it is possible to successfully co-parent, even after a painful divorce! Here’s our advice for divorcing parents:
Don’t badmouth your spouse. Even if your spouse cheated on you, or blew all of your savings in Atlantic City, you still don’t want to badmouth him or her to your children. Doing so only hurts your children and it does not lay the groundwork for a positive co-parenting relationship.
Read books on the subject. If you don’t know how to help your children manage their emotions during the divorce, read some books on children and divorce. It can be helpful to hear what the experts have to say.
Date with discretion. You may be eager to jump back into the dating game, but please do it with discretion. Arrange for date nights when the kids are at your ex’s house and don’t introduce anyone to your children until you are in a committed relationship. Many experts suggest waiting until you’ve been seeing someone for six months before introducing them to your children, especially if your kids are older and harbor resentment about you dating. Tread carefully and be conscious of your children’s feelings.
Stay close to your children’s home. If you’re the non-custodial parent who’s paying child support, the best way to maintain a meaningful relationship with your children is to stay physically close to them. If you can stay in the same school zone, it will make it much easier to see your children regularly.
Be nice to your ex-spouse’s new partner. If your ex dates or marries someone new, be polite and respectful to the new partner, and don’t say mean things about them to your kids. After all, you don’t want to seem like the jealous and insecure ex-husband or wife, now do you?
Be flexible about scheduling. If your ex needs you to watch the kids so he or she can fill in for somebody at work, say “yes” if you’re available. Co-parenting is much easier if you can both be flexible about childcare, even if it’s not scheduled in the Parenting Plan or divorce agreement.
Be involved in after-school activities. If you have time to be your child’s Girl or Boy Scout troop leader, soccer or baseball coach, by all means do it. Find creative ways to be involved in your child’s after-school activities. Or, volunteer to help out in their class. Be involved!
If you’re looking for a cheap, no-fault divorce in Pennsylvania, contact our office today to set up a free case evaluation!