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Battling Loneliness During Uncontested Divorce

Posted By Attorney Jim Cairns || 28-Jan-2013

Going through an uncontested divorce leaves many individuals feeling lonely. These feelings are natural as you adjust to a new lifestyle without a spouse. We have some tips to help combat those lonely feelings as you move through your Pennsylvania uncontested divorce and your post divorce life.

If you have some extra time on your hands, you may want to consider volunteering. An online search will give you plenty of options. Also, volunteering is a great way to build up some marketing skills.

Is there something you always wanted to try but never did? Now that you are divorced, you may have time on your hands to become a volunteer. Volunteering gives you a great opportunity to try something new without fully committing to a new career. Also, the relationships you build can help tremendously. You will not only be able to make new friends, but also potential new job contacts.

Pets are a great way to lose the blues after divorce. Animals unconditionally love the people who take care of them. Seeing my dog wag her tail when I came in the door gave me considerable comfort as I was going through my divorce. You also have a chance to give a homeless animal a home if you adopt from your local animal shelter.

Join a fitness center. This is a great way to relieve stress and meet new people. Shop around in your area to see if there are specials or discounted prices for new members.

Get out of bed and off the couch. Don't linger, laying around the house in a post-divorce stupor. Find things to distract yourself. This could be anything from housework to playing a Wii game.

Update your level of technology. This could be something as simple as learning about the features on your cell phone to getting connected on social media venues such as Facebook and Twitter.

Weed out your toxic friends. You may want to settle for unhealthy relationships because you are so lonely, but you aren't doing yourself any favors. Check out Meetup.com. There are a variety of interests and you can find activities to join in your local area, a great way to start healthy friendships.

Here are a few more quick suggestions for dealing with life after divorce:

  1. Take a class at your local community college;
  2. Find creative ways to make money;
  3. Reconnect with old friends;
  4. Spend more time with family members;
  5. Become a Big Brother or Big Sister;
  6. Redecorate the house. You can find cheap tips with an internet search;
  7. Organize your house, clean out the closets and the junk drawers – maybe even the garage;
  8. Join a divorce support group;
  9. Start a new hobby;
  10. Update your wardrobe;
  11. Get a hold of some self-help books – local libraries are a good first stop;
  12. Make a playlist of inspiring songs, dance music or any music that will elevate your mood. A popular song on playlists is I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor.

Remember don't isolate yourself after your no-fault divorce. You may feel like hiding from the world, but give yourself that push to get out and engage with others. Don't let those invites pile up, say yes!

If your feelings of loneliness persist for a long duration, please seek the help of a professional.