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Reinventing Yourself After Divorce

Posted By Cairns Law Offices || 19-Nov-2018

Divorce has this way of giving unhappy spouses a fresh start. While the first six or 12 months may be hard, it’s also a time for quiet reflection and for many, it’s a time for reinvention.

Not that people aren’t happy about who they are, but sometimes after they’ve been in an unhappy marriage, they’ve neglected to take care of themselves. They’ve spent so much time supporting the family, their spouse and taking care of the kids, they’ve forgotten all about what makes them happy.

When people are going through a divorce, often they’ll start to think about self-care and more importantly, self-improvement. They could be doing it for themselves, their children, or so they can feel good when they start dating again. A lot of times it’s all the above.

Ways to Focus on Self-Improvement

Has the possibility of divorce gotten you thinking about self-improvement? If you’re excited about focusing on yourself for a change, here’s our advice:

  • Divorce is the BEST time to get healthy and in the best shape of your life. This could include joining a gym, taking workout classes, hitting the trails, or running around a high school track. The healthier you are, the better you’ll feel.
  • If you have a junk food habit, we recommend eliminating sugar, flour, and processed foods, and eating as “clean” as possible.
  • If you haven’t read in a while, now is a great time to catch up on your reading. Select books that will nourish your soul and make you feel good.
  • Educate yourself on finances. This can include reading books that will help you gain control of your financial future.
  • Sign up for a class that you’ve always wanted to try, whether it’s cooking, yoga, kickboxing, computers, or whatever floats your boat.
  • If you’re in a dead-end job, now is a good time to sign up for a continuing education class or revaluate your career. Would an advanced degree or going to a technical school improve your situation and make you happier?
  • If you want to make new friends, get out and about. Great places to meet new people include gyms and classes at local rec centers and community colleges.
  • If you can reasonably plan a short trip or two with your kids or friends (or by yourself), do it. A trip can be a nice distraction and it may help put things in perspective as you step away from your daily box.

In reality, nobody knows you like you do. If you yearn to have a better life, what does that look like and what do you need to do to get there? Write down your goals and break down the steps that you need to take to accomplish them. Then, take action.

If anything about your marriage held you back, now is the time to visualize your dreams and make them a reality. And remember, it starts with baby steps.