Till death do we part. Are marriage vows forever? On our wedding day we tell our loved one that we will be there in sickness and in health and for better and for worse. Yet the uncontested divorce rate continues to increase.
Marriage vows have changed over the years. Most women will no longer say that they promise to obey their husband. Personalized vows are becoming more popular as couples believe they are more meaningful.
A growing number of couples now create their own marriage vows. Till death do we part is starting to be omitted from marriage vows. Some of the options that are replacing the traditional parting include:
- Until our time together is over;
- For as long as our love lasts; and
- As long as we continue to love each other.
Individuals sometimes find themselves before a therapist not only mourning their marriage, but the fact they broke their marriage vows – especially till death do we part. If the vows were made in a church the breaking of vow can add to the grieving process.
People who are modifying their vows are stating that they are realist. In addition, they go on to say that they do not take their marital commitments any lighter. Yet, there are criticisms of the modified vows.
Critics believe that the new vows set a marriage up for disaster. They argue that the revamped vows set up a mind frame for failure. Some psychologist have equated the term forever with being committed for life no matter what happens.
It is believed that children of divorce are one of the reasons for new reshaping vows . These children who grow into adults may have subconscious notions that love really doesn't last forever. Other factors which contribute to personalizing vows are that a person may be on a second or third marriage and the restructuring of families – such as blended families. Though, there are some individuals who do not want to use the word death in their vows so they will look for a comfortable alternative.
The Anglican Archbishop of Sydney caused an outrage when he modified the marriage vows for women in Australia. He felt that women should include that they will submit to their husbands. As a result social media venues such as Facebook and Twitter started strong debates on the issue.
As women continue to break away from conservative roles in society wedding vows appear to continue to become more modernized. The decision to personalize wedding vows has spread internationally. In a survey taken in Australia one in three couples now write their own vows.